There's a lot to be said about a kiss. Then again, there's a lot of talk about them too. Not to mention a lot of emphasis put on a kiss. All that amounts to a lot of pressure on being a good kisser. With Valentine's Day just past, I've done a lot of thinking on the subjects of kissing. What is the most important kiss you can ever have? Your first kiss? Your first romantic kiss? Your first kiss with your significant other? The kiss your grandma gives in front of all your friends? Okay, maybe not that last one, but there's a lot of kisses out there to choose from. So, like I said it got me to examining all the kisses I've had in my life to come up with the most important one. I ask you to bear with me, as I take a trip down memory lane. Feel free to pick your most important and let me know if my final choice is the right one. Just to keep you informed. Names have been changed, because none of us are that innocent.
My First Kiss. It was springtime, as such things happen most in the spring. I was in the first grade, minding my own business, as I waited for my turn on the big boy swing. Everything was right with the world, because in four short hours I'd be home in time to watch Tom and Jerry and if I was lucky there would be a Droopy on, too. Then it happened! Sarah--not her real name--Jenkins jumped between the swing set and kissed me! Right on the lips! I spit. I sputtered! I might have tinkled myself from the shock but don't expect me to admit to it freely. The point was it was my first kiss and I could very well have contracted cooties! None of that mattered so much as the fact, she did it in front of all my friends and several bullies from the third grades. Those guys were vicious and for a solid month, I was known as kissy kissy smoochy face. As first kisses went, I was too traumatized to remember much of it, but in the back of my mind, I think I secretly liked it. Of course, it took me about seven years to come to grips with that.
My first romantic kiss. It had everything a first real kiss should have. Teenage angst. Passion. A touch of the forbidden. This thing had the makings of an after school special. Her parents didn't like me. My parents didn't like her. Which ought to tell you we weren't backing out of this for anything. Twenty-six years later I can still remember that kiss and it's the benchmark that I judged every other kiss by for years to come. Even though, her dad found out about us and pretty much ended it for us, I still see her from time to time and think fondly of that kiss with no regrets. Teenagers don't love with their hearts. They love with their hormones, so whatever we had was captured in a moment and not in a lifetime. Love takes more work than teenagers want to deal with. Drama on the other hand they excel at dealing with.
Let me take a break here to say, there are many kisses between these and the rest of your life. Some are good, but most are practice for the ones that matter. I hope you'll excuse me for not mentioning them. I'm spilling my guts enough without giving you the dirt on everything. I do have some self respect left inside me. Being an author hasn't totally killed all of it. Yet!
The Kiss! Yep, we're to that one. Let me set this up for you. I'd known Jenn for awhile, about eight years. We'd seen each other sporadically over that time. From the first time, I'd seen her, I thought she was beautiful. At that time, she was seeing someone, and I had just stopped seeing someone. So, she wasn't totally on my radar and I didn't even blip on hers. A couple years passed. She wasn't with someone, but I kind of was. Again not a good time. I still thought she was beautiful. Then, about five years down the road, I finally worked the courage up to ask her. She said yes and we went out to see a movie, Fallen with Denzel Washington. Guys, if you're reading this, make Denzel your go to guy on romantic movies, even though Fallen wasn't romantic. Any Denzel movie works just as good. The date ended great and I asked her out again. She said yes. So we went to see Spice World, which Morgan, her daughter wanted to see. I took them with my niece Jamie to see it. Afterwards, we all went out for pizza. Don't worry I'm getting to the kiss. You're all a bunch of kiss addicts, if you ask me.
After I dropped Jamie off with my brother, we went back to Jenn's apartment. Morgan, begrudgingly, took her bath. She was seven at the time, so still at that I'm clean enough stage. Somewhere between you better use soap this time and water sloshing under the door, it happened. The kiss that told me I'd never kiss another woman again. It had everything that kiss had back in high school. A touch of the forbidden, because neither of us wanted Morgan to catch us and give us that yuck look. Passion. But, it had something that first kiss didn't. In that lippy embrace, I felt real love for the first time. I'm sure there was some hormones involved, but this time my brain was onboard. I can't explain why, doubt anyone can, but I knew this funny, beautiful and slightly crazy woman was the ever-loving it. In that kiss, I couldn't imagine living without her. Luckily for me, she felt the same or this would be a sick stalker post. Six months later were married. Hey, I work fast and it must have been right. This year we celebrate 14 wonderful years. Why they are wonderful is another blog entirely, but trust me they were.
Still that wasn't the most important kiss. What is, you're screaming at your computer screen? Well, let me answer that before you start smashing the screen with your coffee mugs. The most important kiss is the last one Jenn and I shared. It might not have been romantic. It might have been a quick peck on the cheek or lips as I dropped her off for work but it is the kiss of two people who have loved each other, gone through hell for each other and pretty much promises that no matter what comes, we're going to be there for each other in spite of the nagging things that we do to drive each other crazy without realizing we do them. I might not be able to be romantic all the time, but in that kiss hopefully Jenn knows, I will never let her down or make her doubt my love. I will on the other hand leave my shoes in the middle of the floor where she'll trip over them and leave the toilet seat up. Those are givens.
Yet, as we crawl through life together, I'll be the shoulder she needs to cry on, the warm body she sucks all the heat out of on cold winter nights and steals the covers off of. Above all else, I'll be the man who loves her more than life itself. In the end, isn't that the only thing that matters? So, the next time you pucker up, remember it isn't always about the quality of the kiss. It's about the quality of the heart behind it.